Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize