My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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