I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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