Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
