hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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