broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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