dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
