Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
