You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize