I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Randomize
