that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
