Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
