Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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