I love black thongs
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Randomize
