also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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