i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
