I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize