we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
