You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize