Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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