Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize