i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i love accidental penises.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
