Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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