there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
