I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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