Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize