I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
