Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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