So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
