A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
