ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
