i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
