Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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