Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
