Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
