I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
