I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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