no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
