i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
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