Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize