What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
