i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just googled if crying burns calories
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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