I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Randomize
