yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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