Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
