how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
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