sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
