chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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