We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
