winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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