she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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